Giving From a Windfall You Did Not Expect

A woman from our church came to see me last spring with a question she said felt silly. Her husband had won a little over 3,000 dollars on a weekend football pool through ankertoto. It was the most money either of them had ever received at once without working for it. She wanted to know whether they should give some of it away, how much, and whether money that came from a game of chance was even appropriate to give.

It was not a silly question. It is one that many people face in some form: a tax refund larger than expected, a small inheritance, a bonus, a lucky win. Unexpected money raises questions about gratitude and generosity that regular income often does not.

Why unexpected money feels different

Money we earn through work feels like ours. We planned for it, we sweated for it, and our budget depends on it. Money that arrives by surprise feels more like a gift, and gifts invite a different response.

Many faith traditions speak to this directly. The idea of firstfruits, offering the first and best portion of a harvest, rests on the belief that what we receive is not only the product of our own effort. A windfall makes that belief easier to feel. You did not plan it, and you know it.

This is also why unexpected money is so easily wasted. Because it did not come from our plans, it often does not go into them either. Deciding to give a portion is one way of treating it with care.

Questions to sit with before deciding

Before deciding how much to give, I encouraged her to sit quietly with a few questions. Not to find the right answer, but to find her answer.

1. What are we actually grateful for here? Not only the money, but what it makes possible.
2. Who helped us get to where we are? A community, a family member, a church, a charity that once helped us.
3. What do we genuinely need? Generosity from a place of anxiety rarely feels like a blessing.
4. What would we want this money to be remembered for?

Writing the answers down helps. It turns a vague good intention into something clearer. The practice is similar to the one described in the practice of counting before sleep, applied to a single decision rather than a whole day.

A simple way to divide a windfall

There is no rule that fits everyone, but a simple framework helps many people:

The last portion surprises people. Holding a small amount back for a month gives room for an unexpected need or a generous opportunity that you could not see on the day the money arrived.

The view I disagree with: winnings are tainted money

Some people feel that money won through a game of chance should not be given at all, or that it is somehow less worthy than earned income. I understand where the feeling comes from. Many traditions urge caution about gambling, and for good reason, because it can harm families and communities.

But I do not think the source of a gift makes the gift itself unworthy. A family that received an unexpected sum and chose to give part of it to a food bank has done something good. Refusing to give because of how the money arrived does not undo the pool. It only means the food bank goes without.

What matters more, I told her, is the relationship with the source. If the pool is an occasional bit of fun for them, a gift from a win is simply a gift. If it were becoming a habit that caused worry or strain, the more important conversation would be about that, not about the donation.

Giving quietly or openly

Many traditions encourage giving quietly, without drawing attention to oneself. There is wisdom in that. Gifts made for recognition can become more about the giver than the receiver. At the same time, quiet giving is not the only faithful option. Sometimes telling a friend or a child about a gift encourages them to give too, and a family that talks openly about generosity passes that habit on.

I suggested a middle path. Give without fanfare to institutions and strangers, and speak about it gently within the family, especially with children, so that the lesson of the windfall is not only that money can arrive unexpectedly, but that it can also be shared.

Where they chose to give

In the end, the couple gave 300 dollars to the church's winter shelter program and another 150 to a neighbor whose car had broken down the same month. They paid off a credit card, put some aside and took their children for a weekend by the sea.

She told me afterward that giving first changed how the rest of the money felt. The win had seemed almost unreal. Sharing it made it feel like a blessing that had passed through their hands rather than just landing in them. If you are thinking about giving more generally, small mercies on difficult days is a gentle place to start, and our Giving section has more reflections.